At a recent baby shower, we were asked to give the mum-to-be a word of advice. My piece of advice was that she should ask for help, and accept the help offered. Sounds like a simple bit of information to give someone, but it actually proves quite hard to do. That familiar sin called pride stops us from admitting we need help, asking for it and then accepting it.
I'm reminded of a recent Sunday after church. Sundays can be a little on the difficult side at times, as I have to get four boys from their Cogs groups, the husband usually has to talk to someone about something, the boys are tired and hungry and I have to get them to the car to wait for the husband. So on a Sunday like this, I crossed the road with the tribe and walked them towards the hot car. They weren't being altogether helpful. The baby's hunger and tiredness had evolved into relentless screeching and I couldn't find the magical dummy which brings peace to all mankind. There was silliness and hot and bothered, non brotherly love going on. So quite loudly I demanded some quiet and tried to get them all in their seats with their belts on.
Then it happened, I spotted the wife of an elder at our church, coming towards us, a loving caring lady, who would be happy to help me. So did I approach her? No I ducked down and hid behind a green van next to our car! I said "Oh God, please help me". And then I started laughing. How ridiculous! God actually helped me by pointing out my pride; scared of what she might think and not asking for the help she would gladly offer.
We say to our boys that it's good to do things on our own at times, but if were doing it on our own, because we're worried what people think, or because we think we know better or because we don't want to admit that we're weak, or incase we put people out, then that's just pride! But there I was hiding behind a van in case this kind lady thought I was weak and needed help!
The worst kind of pride is when we don't ask God for His help, we don't admit that we are weak or in need and we try to do it all in our own strength. Instead we hide behind a green van, or money, or a relationship, or working harder, or looking better, or our own self worth. How much better would it have been for me to ask the elder's wife for a helping hand? And how willingly she would have given it to me! How much better is it for me to ask God for His help and how willing is He to give it to me? His words are strong in regards to our pride. He has offered us His help and a relationship with Him through His own son. He knows that I am weak and need His help, His strength, His joy, His peace, His salvation, His forgiveness, His guidance, His care...But it is a choice to seek Him or have no room for Him.
"In his pride the wicked does not seek him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God." Psalm 10v4
"Though the LORD is on high, he looks upon the lowly, but the proud he knows from afar." Psalm 138v6
Oops! My comment here didn't post! :) I was just saying hello as your sister in law Kay sent me here. I had hot/embarrassed/laughing tears picturing your hiding behind that van! Thanks for your candid recount and humble reminder of truth! :)
ReplyDeleteYour blog is so close to my heart! I am just starting out a family- my son is 1 and we are certain there will be at least 2 more children someday! I have talked with about this problem with women in the church since I first got married. Depression hit, housework went down the drain and my marriage suffered. There is a mentality in the Church that "Women of God" are "strong" and able to face anything. Sometimes we're not. Sometimes we need to be honest with people and tell them when we can't cope. When I have been honest and open about my emotional state (because PND hit after my son was born too!), other women have come round, given me a couple of hours to help me clean, or taken Charlie for a walk, etc. So- Thank you!! This is a message that is sorely needed amongst christian women! (sorry for the mini-essay, I'm done now!) x
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