To Be, or Not To Be

So the Summer holidays have officially started! Day One! Although technically last Friday was Day 1 but that was a bit of a blur, and very hot, and a Friday, and I worked, so I'm calling today Day One. A classic start for our family, is snacks. Snacks mark something exciting, or a way to love my kids in an easy, not much effort, kind of way. We have Saturday snacks on a Saturday morning, to celebrate rest day. We have snacks to mark the end of term or the beginning of a holiday or an exciting trip. And of course, birthday snacks is a win! I'm sure in there somewhere is some not great thinking in regards to food equalling joy, but I also see feasting in the Bible as part of all kinds of celebrations, so I'll take that. 

I seem to have more time to myself in the holidays, with all of them off school. What's that about?! Is it maybe the fact that no alarms are going off, no waking up needing to be done, no lunches to be made before 8am, no school drop offs, no uniform stresses, no after school clubs, no homework, no diary checking? Or maybe I dont feel the need to see people, or run errands if the kids are all at home?! I'm really not sure. But Day One, and I seem to have time to write a blog post already.... I mean, its Day One, so I may well peak too soon. I'm well aware that when they are all off together, they all need time to adjust to being off together. And I know in six weeks time I may be dreaming of sending them off to their educational settings, but for today at least, I will enjoy the moment.

I think part of it is that I'm a nicer person in the holidays lol. I seem to say Yes more easily to them. Maybe I have the time to consider their requests, rather than jump to a No, because of all the things that need doing. Maybe I'm just less grumpy when there is no schedule to keep to, less to do, less to achieve, less to get done...

I had a cry with a friend last week about how I'm not doing well in some areas. I listed things that were hard, and where I was sad, and where I was failing. (I'm sure I cried less about these kinds of self-expectations pre-Covid. That quite annoying virus has really changed some of us it seems). 

My friend picked up a couple of bits for me from Asda, and in the bag was a little wrapped gift. I opened it to find a notebook. ('Another notebook', as the husband would say). On the front it said, 'Get Things Done', which she had crossed out and written 'Be Still' in its place. 

She said she had been struck when I shared with her, how many things I hadn't done. She wrote in the notebook, that the best thing I can DO, is to BE. To be in God's presence, to be in His love, to be in His identity, to be in His forgiveness, His grace, His mercy and His Joy. She encouraged me that to be with God, is indeed my goal, my thing to acheive, my thing to get done, not as an item to tick off a list, but as a relationship to build. My Heavenly Father loves it when I grab a moment with Him, a little snack to keep me going. I was amused that this morning I found the notebook on the table, among so many 'To Dos'...some washing, some recycling, some shopping, some tidying, some cleaning.. It's like God was visully asking me, 'To Be or Not To Be'...It's a question I need to Him to keep asking me, and I need to keep choosing To Be.

"Be Still and Know that I am God....The Lord God Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress". Psalm 46v10-11