To Be, or Not To Be

So the Summer holidays have officially started! Day One! Although technically last Friday was Day 1 but that was a bit of a blur, and very hot, and a Friday, and I worked, so I'm calling today Day One. A classic start for our family, is snacks. Snacks mark something exciting, or a way to love my kids in an easy, not much effort, kind of way. We have Saturday snacks on a Saturday morning, to celebrate rest day. We have snacks to mark the end of term or the beginning of a holiday or an exciting trip. And of course, birthday snacks is a win! I'm sure in there somewhere is some not great thinking in regards to food equalling joy, but I also see feasting in the Bible as part of all kinds of celebrations, so I'll take that. 

I seem to have more time to myself in the holidays, with all of them off school. What's that about?! Is it maybe the fact that no alarms are going off, no waking up needing to be done, no lunches to be made before 8am, no school drop offs, no uniform stresses, no after school clubs, no homework, no diary checking? Or maybe I dont feel the need to see people, or run errands if the kids are all at home?! I'm really not sure. But Day One, and I seem to have time to write a blog post already.... I mean, its Day One, so I may well peak too soon. I'm well aware that when they are all off together, they all need time to adjust to being off together. And I know in six weeks time I may be dreaming of sending them off to their educational settings, but for today at least, I will enjoy the moment.

I think part of it is that I'm a nicer person in the holidays lol. I seem to say Yes more easily to them. Maybe I have the time to consider their requests, rather than jump to a No, because of all the things that need doing. Maybe I'm just less grumpy when there is no schedule to keep to, less to do, less to achieve, less to get done...

I had a cry with a friend last week about how I'm not doing well in some areas. I listed things that were hard, and where I was sad, and where I was failing. (I'm sure I cried less about these kinds of self-expectations pre-Covid. That quite annoying virus has really changed some of us it seems). 

My friend picked up a couple of bits for me from Asda, and in the bag was a little wrapped gift. I opened it to find a notebook. ('Another notebook', as the husband would say). On the front it said, 'Get Things Done', which she had crossed out and written 'Be Still' in its place. 

She said she had been struck when I shared with her, how many things I hadn't done. She wrote in the notebook, that the best thing I can DO, is to BE. To be in God's presence, to be in His love, to be in His identity, to be in His forgiveness, His grace, His mercy and His Joy. She encouraged me that to be with God, is indeed my goal, my thing to acheive, my thing to get done, not as an item to tick off a list, but as a relationship to build. My Heavenly Father loves it when I grab a moment with Him, a little snack to keep me going. I was amused that this morning I found the notebook on the table, among so many 'To Dos'...some washing, some recycling, some shopping, some tidying, some cleaning.. It's like God was visully asking me, 'To Be or Not To Be'...It's a question I need to Him to keep asking me, and I need to keep choosing To Be.

"Be Still and Know that I am God....The Lord God Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress". Psalm 46v10-11

Food for Thought

So, in a blog post I wrote last November, called Lights, Camera, Action! the husband had given me some advice. Advice which I had asked for, after not quite knowing what to do with my life. So dramatic... His advice was to write headings in 'one of my many notebooks'. (I believe that is what is known as a side comment) about areas of my life which I feel the need to do something about, or would like to do something about, or have no energy or desire to do anything about... 

He then suggested that under a heading or two, or even all of them, I could write one action, or thought or truth or Bible verse or prayer... to kick off some action. And this is what I have done. I spent quite some time glueing little labels into notebooks, and made two for friends at the same time, who I felt could do with the encouragement. (Totally procrastinating on actually writing anything under any headings of course, but also knowing that one of the headings for me, would be CREATIVITY, so actually I was already being creative. Ha!)

My headings are; God Time, Me Time, Marriage, Kids, House, Creativity, Friends, Writing, Encouragement, Serving, People, Church, Self Care, Job, with three labels left blank, in case I feel inspired at some later date.

My aim is to keep the notebook in my bag, so that if ever I think of something to do with any of the headings, I can make a note of it, which hopefully will result in me praying about it or doing something practical about it. I went for an easy win to start with. I do want to express love individually to my kids more, so as small a gesture as it is, I simply bought them food they would like. 

One of mine always mentions the front of cereal packets; cereal is apparently meant to be accompanied by strawberries and blueberries. (Not sure who actually does that every day). One of mine is always blessed by non-sandwiches, so a wrap with trimmings is a win. A bigger packet of crisps, than all your siblings get, was a triumphant moment for one. For the one with a cold, those 'nice to your nose' tissues, with add-ons to only his packed lunch for a week. For one a hidden pink donut, and for one a simple Turkish Delight that he had tried at a friend's house. (Apparently this one was actually gross and he meant something else). 

I needed it to be a small start, rather than a To Do list to be guilted by. Just spending a couple of minutes thinking what specific food to get them, nudged me to what specific things they need prayer for. I guess you could call it Food for Thought. Often I don't pray enough for my kids, or I lump them together as one entity. But individually, they have specific needs and wants, specific tastes and likes, specific things which they need God's wisdom on, His comfort for, His guidance in, as well as individual gifting which I need to ask God to flourish more in their lives. Maybe they should have a page each in my notebook. It says in the Bible, that God has a vast sum of thoughts about us. Vast; Boundless, Immeasurable, Limitless, Infinite, Colossal, Endless...              I wonder what He would write in His notebook under my name.

"How Precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand...." Psalm 139v17-18

Time to Build

Last month, our church had a Gift Campaign, called Time To Build. I think the last couple of years have not necessarily felt like a time to build anything. Maybe a 'Time to Get By', a 'Time to be forced to Homeschool', a 'Time to not Socially Interact', a 'Time to isolate', a 'Time to put things on hold', a 'Time to complete Netflix'... So I think it's a good phrase to use. It says what we are going to be doing, looking forward as a church. We were raising money for;

*Our Young people to get to Newday a Youth Festival which is a whole load of godly, crazy fun.

*A conference for twenties and thirties.

*A weekend away as a whole church.

*Emmanuel Institute - studying the Bible.

(Also, 20% of everything raised, was for the Newfrontiers Ukraine Response Fund).

I guess we are saying, it is Time to build church again. Time to invest in our young people, the next generations of the church, time to teach the Bible, time to build our church community, the family of God again. I missed my family over this strange couple of years, and held on maybe more fondly, to moments when we were reunited. I have missed my church family too. I have missed building with people, serving and receiving from people. 

I think a 'Time to Build' is also a bit of a personal challenge. Because whatever the last couple of years have looked like for people, there is a definite weariness, slower pace, tiredness, or a general weirdness that we cant quite put our finger on. As much as we may be ready to build again, or at least start trying, it comes with some apprehension in regards to our capacitywillingness, our energy levels, our social confidence etc. .

When we give of our money, it can be an easy opt out...I'll give my money, so I don't have to to do anything to help. I don't think that is often the case though. I think we can give money, because our heart is on board; we want to build, we want to start, we want to be a part of something and giving is a great way to commit to that thought. I think for some of us we need to start thinking, 'In what way, with even my depleted capacity/energy, can I start to build church again?'  (Oh and I think it is much easier to write it, than do it. Last week I hid at the back of a prayer meeting, literally hid. So there's days for both).

Today, we were told that the current total for the giving campaign is at £116.754.79. Whoop whoop! What a great figure, and what a great encouragement that people are wanting to build.

When I told one of my kids the total, they asked if that is what we had given as a family! Wow. That kid has faith!! As a family, we try to teach well when it comes to giving and money in general. So with pocket money, and any earned money, the kids have always been asked to split it. How much are they giving to God/the church? How much are they saving? And how much do they want to just spend freely? Even when our kids have not been walking with God, or overly interested in church, we have still asked them to 'Give', as it's important for society as a whole, that we are not just takers. 

I always love amounts like the one shared earlier, because you know there are people who gave their groceries budget, or their holiday budget. People who gave, and then gave more. People who gave all that they had left. People who had never given before. People who went on faith adventures. People who went without in order to give. I love the 79p at the end. Because I know God knows where that 79p came from. He knows the heart of every giver, and what it cost the person. The Bible says that God loves a cheerful Giver! And as a Father, He knew what it was to give His absolute best, when He gave His son, Jesus. He generously gave His son to us, who loves the church and wants us to build the church with Him, and for His glory. It is indeed a Time to Build. (It actually always has been).

"Whoever sows sparingly, will also reap sparingly. And whoever sows generously, will also reap generously....And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work". 2 Corinthains 9v6-8